Creating Strong Relationships:
Breaking Unhealthy Patterns

You’re sick of the same old patterns.

Day in and day out, we operate like a machine. After all, our body is a literal machine that seeks comfort and familiarity because that is what is physically “easiest” for us.

Thus, we fast-tracked ourselves to relive the same patterns or scripts on autopilot repeatedly.

There might have been a time when these old patterns were helpful – they typically start that way, but if we’re not careful, we can get stuck in old thinking patterns that don’t serve us anymore. Most of the time, we only recognize these patterns when they are causing disturbance or distress in our lives.

Identifying old, unhealthy patterns is only half the journey, but you’re in the right place to start breaking them.

To break the patterns, we’ll do these three things…

Please bear with me through some of this jargon. I swear it will be helpful!

Using Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT)…

This approach to therapy is predicated on the idea that our thoughts affect our feelings, and our feelings affect our behaviors.

Have you ever been in a position where you were overlooked or not considered? Automatically the first thought you had was something like, “There must be something wrong with me”?

How did that make you feel? Do you believe that now? Is self-blame part of your identity?

The truth is every situation elicits some response. But, if we can produce healthier, balanced automatic thoughts, it will discourage all the harsh feelings and emotions from following and help us disengage with behaviors that can keep us trapped in such cycles.

In CBT, we hear a lot about “cognitive restructuring” or “rewiring” our brain to change faulty thinking patterns. This challenges unhealthy and harmful thoughts so your brain can make new neural pathways with healthier thinking patterns. It’s amazing what we’re capable of!

(Although we all have the potential to do this, it’s not easy to do when your nervous system is dysregulated.)

Regulating the nervous system…

Think of your nervous system as your central control system. It’s in charge of sending messages back and forth between the body and the brain. This linkage has been coined “the mind-body connection.” (You’ll hear this phrase used extensively in mindfulness activities like yoga.)

We live in a world where people are constantly doing and going and trying to achieve more – this “go-go-go” state of living activates our parasympathetic nervous system, which you may have heard of as your “fight, flight, or freeze” mode. This response is involuntary. When it happens, the part of your brain that does all your abstract thinking, problem-solving, and all that jazz gets turned off!

And when those capabilities are arrested, you’re stuck using your survival brain, the more “primitive” part of your brain that lacks the tools to deal with chronic stress, anxiety, depression, etc.

Now, this is where the art comes in!

Using art and the creative process…

The creative use of art accomplishes two things…

First, it regulates the nervous system.

Art is one of many things that provides a mind-body connection. When we are engaged in the art-making process, we are fully in the moment, allowing our mind to be at peace and our body relaxed. There is scientific evidence that explains how art calms the part of our brain called the Amygdala, which controls our alarm system (nervous system). The more in balance your body is with your brain, the fewer mental health issues you will endure.

Second, it provides insight and honesty.

In traditional talk therapy, it can be easy to dance around our truth using logic. When we talk about the not-so-good things we’ve done, it’s sometimes hard to admit or say out loud, so instead, we begin to rationalize or attempt to justify our truths verbally.

But art doesn’t always give you a chance to do that, especially if you dig deep and let the art speak for you. Art helps us recognize and identify faulty thinking patterns and encourages us to be honest with ourselves.

So… how does all this affect the quality of your relationships?

It’s no secret that your relationship with yourself is the most important one you will have in your lifetime – it’s also important to understand that your relationship with yourself is the blueprint for all other relationships in your life.

If you can dig deep enough to identify what drives your faulty thinking patterns, it is only then we can start using the tools listed above to heal and better understand your relationship with yourself.

Breaking your unhealthy patterns will result in a strong, healthier, and authentic relationship with yourself, which will improve all other relationships in your life.

Start breaking unhealthy patterns…

And improve your relationships today!

If any of this resonated with you, it sounds like you are ready to start breaking your unhealthy patterns and rebuild your relationship with yourself and others!

Life is already challenging enough, don’t make it more challenging by evading the work that needs to be done.

Schedule a consultation call with me today to break your unhealthy cycles and better connect with yourself and others, schedule a consultation call with me today! (401) 366-4155

I will answer any questions or concerns and determine if working together is a good fit!